Monday, August 24, 2009

Husband wife Jokes


Wife hit her husband with frying pan A wife hit her husband with a frying pan. Husband: What was that for..? Wife: I found a paper in your pocket with the name Jenny on it. Husband: I took part in a race last week and Jenny was the name of my horse. Wife: Sorry..! Next day wife hit him with the frying pan again Husband: What now..? Wife: Your horse is on the Phone. Wife came home with a goat. Wife came home with a goat.Husband asked"Is bhains ko ghar kion lai ho?"Wife:"Dikhta nahin, bakri hy!"Husband:"Bakri se hi poch raha hon" Husband wife mein larai hoi Husband wife mein larai hoi,Husband ghar se chala gaya, Husb:Rat ko phone pay,"Khanay mein kia hai"Wife:Zeher.Husb:Mai dair se aonga, tum kha kar so jana: Man: Sir, my wife is missing.. Man: Sir, my wife is missing.Postmaster:bhai ye post office hai,police station me complain dijiyee.Man:Kia karon, khushi k marekuch samajh nahin aa raha Why did u shoot ur wife ? Judge:why did u shoot ur wifeinstead of shootingher lover? Sardar:Your honour,it's easier to shoot a woman once,than shooting one man every week. How woman calls their husband in first 6 years How woman calls their husband in first 6 yearsYr 1.JanuYr 2.O G.Yr 3.Sunte ho?Yr 4.O bunty k pappaYr 5.Kahan mar gaye?Yr 6.Tum aate ho k main aaon? Wife to husband:- kash aap sms hotay Wife:Jaanu kash aap SMS hotay,Main aap ko save karti, Husband:Jaan-e-man, kaash tum ring tone hoti,Main her haftay tumhe change karta Sardar ki wife inspecter se! Sardar ki wife inspecter se!Mera husband ek hafte pehle aalolene gaya tha abhi tak wapis nahi aaya:-( Inspector bhi sardar tha bola:-to behan kuch or paka lo:-) 1 Horror Movie Dekhi Husband:rat ko mene 1 horror movie dekhi,1 churail kabhi mere agekabhi piche aur kabhi sath chal rahi thi,Wife:Kaun si movie thi?Husband:Apni shadi ki

What are the signs and symptoms of H1N1 (swine) flu in people?

The symptoms of H1N1 (swine) flu in people are similar to the symptoms of regular human flu and include fever, cough, sore throat, body aches, headache, chills and fatigue. Some people have reported diarrhea and vomiting associated with H1N1 (swine) flu. In the past, severe illness (pneumonia and respiratory failure) and deaths have been reported with H1N1 (swine) flu infection in people. Like seasonal flu, H1N1 (swine) flu may cause a worsening of underlying chronic medical conditions.
In children emergency warning signs that need urgent medical attention include:
Fast breathing or trouble breathing
Bluish or gray skin color
Not drinking enough fluids
Severe or persistent vomiting
Not waking up or not interacting
Being so irritable that the child does not want to be held
Flu-like symptoms improve but then return with fever and worse cough
In adults, emergency warning signs that need urgent medical attention include:
Difficulty breathing or shortness of breath
Pain or pressure in the chest or abdomen
Sudden dizziness
Confusion
Severe or persistent vomiting
Flu-like symptoms improve but then return with fever and worse cough

Avoid Contact With Others
If you are sick, you may be ill for a week or longer. You should stay home and keep away from others as much as possible, including avoiding travel and not going to work or school, for at least 24 hours after your fever is gone except to get medical care or for other necessities. (Your fever should be gone without the use of fever-reducing medicine.) If you leave the house to seek medical care, wear a facemask, if available and tolerable, and cover your coughs and sneezes with a tissue. In general, you should avoid contact with other people as much as possible to keep from spreading your illness, especially people at increased risk of severe illness from influenza. With seasonal flu, people may be contagious from one day before they develop symptoms to up to 7 days after they get sick. Children, especially younger children, might potentially be contagious for longer periods. People infected with the novel H1N1 are likely to have similar patterns of infectiousness as with seasonal flu.
Treatment is Available for Those Who Are Seriously III
It is expected that most people will recover without needing medical care.
If you have severe illness or you are at high risk for flu complications, contact your health care provider or seek medical care. Your health care provider will determine whether flu testing or treatment is needed. Be aware that if the flu becomes widespread, less testing will be needed, so your health care provider may decide not to test for the flu virus.
Antiviral drugs can be given to treat those who become severely ill with influenza. These antiviral drugs are prescription medicines (pills, liquid or an inhaler) with activity against influenza viruses, including novel H1N1 flu virus. These medications must be prescribed by a health care professional.
There are two influenza antiviral medications that are recommended for use against novel H1N1 flu. The drugs that are used for treating novel H1N1 flu are called oseltamivir (trade name Tamiflu ®) and zanamivir (Relenza ®). As the novel H1N1 flu spreads, these antiviral drugs may become in short supply. Therefore, the drugs may be given first to those people who have been hospitalized or are at high risk of severe illness from flu. The drugs work best if given within 2 days of becoming ill, but may be given later if illness is severe or for those at a high risk for complications.
Aspirin or aspirin-containing products (e.g., bismuth subsalicylate – Pepto Bismol) should not be administered to any confirmed or suspected ill case of novel influenza A (H1N1) virus infection aged 18 years old and younger due to the risk of Reye’s syndrome. For relief of fever, other anti-pyretic medications are recommended such as acetaminophen or non steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs. For more information about Reye’s syndrome, visit the National Institute of Health website .
Check ingredient labels on over-the-counter cold and flu medications to see if they contain aspirin.
Children 5 years of age and older and teenagers with the flu can take medicines without aspirin, such as acetaminophen (Tylenol®) and ibuprofen (Advil®, Motrin®, Nuprin®), to relieve symptoms.
Children younger than 4 years of age should NOT be given over-the-counter cold medications without first speaking with a health care provider.
Emergency Warning Signs
If you become ill and experience any of the following warning signs, seek emergency medical care.
In children, emergency warning signs that need urgent medical attention include:
Fast breathing or trouble breathing
Bluish or gray skin color
Not drinking enough fluids
Severe or persistent vomiting
Not waking up or not interacting
Being so irritable that the child does not want to be held
Flu-like symptoms improve but then return with fever and worse cough
In adults, emergency warning signs that need urgent medical attention include:
Difficulty breathing or shortness of breath
Pain or pressure in the chest or abdomen
Sudden dizziness
Confusion
Severe or persistent vomiting
Flu-like symptoms improve but then return with fever and worse cough
Protect Yourself, Your Family, and Community
Stay informed. Health officials will provide additional information as it becomes available. Visit the CDC H1N1 Flu website.
Cover your nose and mouth with a tissue when you cough or sneeze. Throw the tissue in the trash after you use it.
Wash your hands often with soap and water, especially after you cough or sneeze. Alcohol-based hand cleaners* are also effective.

Avoid touching your eyes, nose and mouth. Germs spread this way.
Try to avoid close contact with sick people.
If you are sick with a flu-like illness, stay home for at least 24 hours after your fever is gone except to get medical care or for other necessities. (Your fever should be gone without the use of fever-reducing medicine.) Keep away from others as much as possible. This is to keep from making others sick.
If you are sick and sharing a common space with other household members in your home, wear a facemask, if available and tolerable, to help prevent spreading the virus to others. For more information, see the Interim Recommendations for Facemask and Respirator Use.
Learn more about how to take care of someone who is ill in "Taking Care of a Sick Person in Your Home"
Follow public health advice regarding school closures, avoiding crowds, and other social distancing measures.
If you don’t have one yet, consider developing a family emergency plan as a precaution. This should include storing a supply of extra food, medicines, and other essential supplies. Further information can be found in the "Flu Planning Checklist"

KNIGHT XV vs HUMMER
















The KNIGHT XV is priced at $310,000 USD. Only 100 will be made available as a limited first run. Each vehicle takes 1,500 hours to build by hand.
---- Specifications ---- Price $310,000 Production 100 Engine 6.8 liter V10 Weight -- Aspiration -- Torque 498 lb-ft HP 400 hp HP/Weight -- HP/Liter 58.8 hp per liter 1/4 mile -- 0-62 mph -- Top Speed --





Cipla has launched A New Drug against Swine Flu - where Virenza isavailable


Cipla has launched a new drug against Swine Flu (Virenza), as an alternative option to Osetalmavir drug. Please find attached herewith the availability centers.

Swine Flu




Sunday, August 23, 2009

written by a PAK journalist

Written by a Pakistani journalist about India [MUST READ]
Though might not be absolutely true but relatively yes.
Capital suggestion By Dr Farrukh Saleem 12/9/2007 Here's what is happening in India : The two Ambani brothers can buy 100 percent of every company listed on the Karachi Stock Exchange (KSE) and would still be left with $30 billion to spare. The four richest Indians can buy up all goods and services produced over a year by 169 million Pakistanis and still be left with $60 billion to spare. The four richest Indians are now richer than the forty richest Chinese. In November, Bombay Stock Exchange's benchmark Sensex flirted with 20,000 points. As a consequence, Mukesh Ambani's Reliance Industries became a $100 billion company (the entire KSE is capitalized at $65 billion). Mukesh owns 48 percent of Reliance. In November, comes Neeta's birthday. Neeta turned forty-four three weeks ago. Look what she got from her husband as her birthday present: A sixty-million dollar jet with a custom fitted master bedroom, bathroom with mood lighting, a sky bar, entertainment cabins, satellite television, wireless communication and a separate cabin with game consoles. Neeta is Mukesh Ambani's wife, and Mukesh is not India 's richest but the second richest. Mukesh is now building his new home, Residence Antillia (after a mythical, phantom island somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean ). At a cost of $1 billion this would be the most expensive home on the face of the planet. At 173 meters tall Mukesh's new family residence, for a family of six, will be the equivalent of a 60-storeyed building. The first six floors are reserved for parking. The seventh floor is for car servicing and maintenance. The eighth floor houses a mini-theatre. Then there's a health club, a gym and a swimming pool. Two floors are reserved for Ambani family's guests. Four floors above the guest floors are family floors all with a superb view of the Arabian Sea . On top of everything are three helipads. A staff of 600 is expected to care for the family and their family home. In 2004, India became the 3rd most attractive foreign direct investment destination. Pakistan wasn't even in the top 25 countries. In 2004, the United Nations, the representative body of 192 sovereign member states, had requested the Election Commission of India to assist the UN in the holding elections in Al Jumhuriyah al Iraqiyah and Dowlat-e Eslami-ye Afghanestan. Why the Election Commission of India and not the Election Commission of Pakistan? After all, Islamabad is closer to Kabul than is Delhi . Imagine, 12 percent of all American scientists are of Indian origin; 38 percent of doctors in America are Indian; 36 percent of NASA scientists are Indians; 34 percent of Microsoft employees are Indians; and 28 percent of IBM employees are Indians. For the record: Sabeer Bhatia created and founded Hotmail... Sun Microsystems was founded by Vinod Khosla. The Intel Pentium processor, that runs 90 percent of all computers, was fathered by Vinod Dham. Rajiv Gupta co-invented Hewlett Packard's E-speak project. Four out often Silicon Valley start-ups are run by Indians. Bollywood produces 800 movies per year and six Indian ladies have won Miss Universe/Miss World titles over the past 10 years. For the record: Azim Premji, the richest Muslim entrepreneur on the face of the planet, was born in Bombay and now lives in Bangalore.India now has more than three dozen billionaires; Pakistan has none (not a single dollar billionaire) . The other amazing aspect is the rapid pace at which India is creating wealth. In 2002, Dhirubhai Ambani, Mukesh and Anil Ambani's father, left his two sons a fortune worth $2.8 billion. In 2007, their combined wealth stood at $94 billion. On 29 October 2007, as a result of the stock market rally and the appreciation of the Indian rupee, Mukesh became the richest person in the world, with net worth climbing to US$63.2 billion (Bill Gates, the richest American, stands at around $56 billion). Indians and Pakistanis have the same Y-chromosome haplogroup. We have the same genetic sequence and the same genetic marker (namely: M124). We have the same DNA molecule, the same DNA sequence. Our culture, our traditions and our cuisine are all the same. We watch the same movies and sing the same songs. What is it that Indians have and we don't? INDIANS ELECT THEIR LEADERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!And also to mention: They think of Construction of own nation, unlike other nations who are just concerned with destruction of others...
Simple answer why the Indian fare better than the Pakis'.. They don't focus on religion and neither do they spend time and money in devising ways to kill their own and everyone else over religion.

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